While I was driving to work today, I was thinking of the ongoing debate in churches about homosexuality. (When I say ongoing, I mean that this debate is a couple thousand years old.) I thought of the different memes I see on Facebook like "Not accepting your lifestyle is different than hate" etc. So I was thinking on that.
Love is a word that we toss around a lot in society, and hence, a lot of people (not just teens) are confused as to what the word means. My husband and I have thought about this and agree that love means "dedication to the highest good of another person." When you're in a relationship, attraction/chemistry is the feel-good part. That's not love itself. It's very good for a relationship and often starts the relationship. But that's not love. Love is the choice you make, daily, to commit to that person and to their good.
Jesus calls us to love others. The Bible, His Word, lays out the way this world works. God is good, God is love, and the world works according to who He is since He created it. In Mere Christianity C.S. Lewis talks about the world and morality being like a machine: if you run a machine according to its instructions, it works well. If you try to take shortcuts or run the machine the opposite of how it is supposed to be run, it will break down, and it won't run as efficiently. So, the "rules" in the Bible are the instruction manual for how the world works.
Patrick Wood, in his blog, said,
"I believe that God created the universe. I have come to believe that the universe works in harmony with itself and all its respective pieces interact with all the other pieces because God is love. Not that God is a god of love like Mars is the god of war. I mean that God is love. It is His very nature. It defines His existence. And He created the universe. Therefore the basic moral and functional code of the universe is love.
I do not believe Christianity is following a bunch of rules. I do not believe that you have to follow "these" X number of steps or rules to find happiness or success. I do not believe you have do do X, Y, and Z to have a happy marriage. I believe that the answer to it all is love."
According to the Bible (1 Tim. 1:10, 1 Corinthians 6:9, etc.) the act of two men or two women having sex is a sin, like sex outside marriage is a sin. Or pornography. Or caring about objects more than people. Or cheating on your spouse. Or lying. Or hurting someone on purpose. Or disrespecting your parents (Exodus 20:12). Or calling someone names (Matt. 5:22). Or being angry with someone. I understand why LGBT believes that Christians hate homosexuals. Some Christians are confused and judgmental and DO hate homosexuals. Nobody likes being called a sinner, and we call the whole darn world sinners! The Bible is not picking on homosexuals -- it's addressing the sins of everyone in the whole world. That's a lot of different sins.
All of us sin. If I decide not to love someone who sins, I won't love anyone.
However, this is not the response Jesus required. Remember, He is the Creator of the universe, and He said, "Love one another." (John 13:34-35, John 15:12-17) His whole life on earth as a man demonstrated love toward everyone. He loved the crippled and oppressed, who were looked down on in society. He loved women, who were about as valued as dirt in that society. He loved adulterers. He loved tax collectors, who cheated people. He loved rough and uneducated fishermen. He loved the Pharisees by pointing out their wrong thinking that was leading them astray. He forgave sins left and right. (Remember, He suffered horribly on the cross for each sin they committed, so it was personal.) He loved everyone He came in contact with. He listened to each person and saw into their hearts, and He loved them. If He (who created us to be like Him) can see all the dirt and sin and nastiness in peoples' hearts and love us despite it, then we have no excuse for not loving the people around us.
So yes, I can disagree with your lifestyle and still love you and want what's best for you. I do this with my family, my spouse, my friends, and my coworkers all the time! They're all sinners just like me, and I love them. So saying that I believe that homosexuality is wrong but that I love homosexuals just like everyone else shouldn't be hard to accept. (And by the way, this is not just generally true, but specifically true. I have good friends who are gay, and I love them dearly.)
All of us sin. If I decide not to love someone who sins, I won't love anyone.
However, this is not the response Jesus required. Remember, He is the Creator of the universe, and He said, "Love one another." (John 13:34-35, John 15:12-17) His whole life on earth as a man demonstrated love toward everyone. He loved the crippled and oppressed, who were looked down on in society. He loved women, who were about as valued as dirt in that society. He loved adulterers. He loved tax collectors, who cheated people. He loved rough and uneducated fishermen. He loved the Pharisees by pointing out their wrong thinking that was leading them astray. He forgave sins left and right. (Remember, He suffered horribly on the cross for each sin they committed, so it was personal.) He loved everyone He came in contact with. He listened to each person and saw into their hearts, and He loved them. If He (who created us to be like Him) can see all the dirt and sin and nastiness in peoples' hearts and love us despite it, then we have no excuse for not loving the people around us.
So yes, I can disagree with your lifestyle and still love you and want what's best for you. I do this with my family, my spouse, my friends, and my coworkers all the time! They're all sinners just like me, and I love them. So saying that I believe that homosexuality is wrong but that I love homosexuals just like everyone else shouldn't be hard to accept. (And by the way, this is not just generally true, but specifically true. I have good friends who are gay, and I love them dearly.)
Loving someone is intentional. So Christians, when you love people, or when you say you love homosexuals like everyone else, that means more than tolerance. The world calls for tolerance, but Jesus calls us higher (as usual). No one wants to be "tolerated." It's like being ignored. You don't want your spouse to "tolerate" you. Loving is really looking out for the people around you and being kind and considerate for their good, no matter how they treat you.
So...saying that you love homosexuals is great, but if you dislike your neighbor because their dog barks and poops on your lawn, you're still not following what Jesus said. You're not living the way you're designed to live. You're still taking a shortcut. If you say you love people who are different from you, that's great, but what about the boyfriend that cheated on you and tore your heart out? Have you forgiven him? How about the parent that made you feel like you were worthless or dirty? Have you forgiven them? How about the bully? The coworker that is condescending and tries to make you look bad? The person who gossips about you and tries to ruin your reputation? Have you forgiven those people? Are you loving them? Let's think about that.
God calls us to love everyone we come in contact with. That's what Jesus did. And if you ask Him, He will give you His love to people when you just can't love or forgive them on your own. So ask Him to, even if you don't want to.
Let's go out there and love.
Photo credit: Michael Fenton on unsplash.com
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